God keeps taking things I think I’m certain of and surprising me.
I am learning to trust Him not only in the trials that I didn’t expect, but also in the blessings I didn’t expect.
My plans and expectations for better or worse are laid to waste by the reality that God is, as always, in control. It was about three years ago that I sat beneath a tree by the stream at Berachah, staring up at strong branches and the night sky, as someone over the phone reminded me, “Sarah, you’re not God. YOU’RE NOT GOD.” I know that that friend was simply being an unknowing mouthpiece of the Father Who loves me, and I have never forgotten that moment of realizing just how wholly I needed to surrender my will.
I have been reminded of that moment many, many times since then, as I too often seek to take control again. Yet He is always gentle and loving in breaking me and bringing me to my knees again, bringing me back to a place where I am humbled by the greatness of His love and Who He is.
And for that, dear God, I am grateful. I am so thankful for how You love me so much that despite my seeming inability to ever really wrap my mind around trusting you as completely as I know I ought to, You woo me into a greater submission and obediance simply by Your heart for me.
Thank you- for everything, You know.
I personally am not someone who has any great number of conspiracy theories. Yes, when a sudden Swine Flu epidemic broke out shortly after Obama was elected as president, I did wonder if the man-made disease had been released on-command. But come on, when it comes to Obama, politics, and the American government, I am most certainly not the only suspicious person around. There are lots of conspiracy theories, like the ones you learn about when you watch National Treasure. But the kind of conspiracy theories I’m prone to come up with are slightly less political and exciting. I tend to watch my sister take a long drink from MY glass of water, and then say suddenly, “I see what you’re doing! You’re passive-aggressively trying to kill me by drinking my water, and slowly removing everything I need to live!” This is the sort of comment that leads to my sister’s laughter and to jokes about being passive-aggressive between a ninth grade boy and I, as he is constantly asking me for water...
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